Tuesday, 24 July 2012

Kamikaze Holiday in Thailand. Tony Blue Scores Again?

The Bookshop Guru

I recently had an amazing and exciting holiday in the land of the smile, and that is Thailand.  I started my holiday in Bangkok and spent half my time there before moving down south to the coast.

In Bangkok I soon realized that being stuck in a taxi car at the traffic lights which seemed forever, and I could almost write a dissertation it takes to move forward at certain times of the day and night.

They say the traffic is bad in London, but try it in Bangkok. I decided in the end to go what I called “ Kamikaze’ that is ride pillion on a motor bike taxi which is a lot faster if not exciting because these guys and girls get you there by going through any gap between cars, trucks and buses and you name it they did it. But I would advise  it’s not for the faint hearted or anyone with a weak ticker. Of course being single and a dog without a lead I sampled fully the night life.

Boy Oh Boy, what a life – I would say try it before you criticize it. I know I’ve had more pussy then Rooney even before I got to Bangkok and that’s official and the Truth Never Lies. And that was just the icing on the cake. One thing I would say about Thailand is its people love to work and that means everyone from taxi drivers, sales assistants, bar girls and the whole working force. This love of working is not the same in England where people come from Europe and sponge on our welfare system just because they can, and we can’t afford it because we are bankrupt as a country, but they still come and open their big mouths.

The places to go in Bangkok are numerous and you can get good food from the street vendors who are always pleasant and not so in England where most of the time they are racist and don’t know what customer service means.

Soi Cowboy was a place I found by accident and it turned out to be a paradise of love for a single guy who is more of a dog on heat and has  less patience than most dogs on heat. The rest of the holiday I spent in Pattaya on the coast. Where purely by chance the first night I found myself in a Go – Go bar. I won’t tell you where - that’s a secret a secret I will keep to myself. But I will give you a clue it’s a street (soi) off the most famous street in Thailand called “ Walking Street’  In this street I found a GO –Go Bar which as I say I found purely by chance and I had to bypass many other go-go bars to get to it. It was especially worth it because I am a dog as I said before without a lead and I like it that way a stray.

The 2nd part of the Kamikaze holiday in Thailand I spent in what I would describe for a single guy is paradise. Anyhow I went into the Go- GO Bar and if I said it was like paradise well it was for a dog like me. I had three girls on my right and three girls on my left. Some girls were naked and some had no knickers on and others had not much else on either, OBTW I had also one on each knee and the girl I had fallen for was on the GO- GO bar dancing with clothes on. So you can guess what I night I had? OBTW I rang the bell more times than I can remember which means you buy every girl in the bar a drink for the princely sum of only about $30 dollars. I enjoyed the pleasure so why not hey? I felt like a football star and spent the next few nights frequenting the same Go- Go Bar.  The best experience of my dog life, as a single guy without a lead, and a dog with no limits of where or when I would love, Oh what a place. Go Kamikaze in Thailand! 

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There’s an old saying “you have to be up early, to catch the worm.” Otherwise amigo, hasta la vitas, senoritas.

P.S. Sponsored by Madbrokes a comedian on antidepressants.

In my latest book “It’s Never Too Late” read how dreams do come true, but be careful what you wish for. Understand the secret of greed and you will attain one of the secrets of prosperity. The book will also take you on a journey and explores love, money, luck, and much more.


Hey, Chuck. Did you bring any spending money? Viva la vida loca.

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