Monday, 7 November 2011

Living With Bipolar a Black Cloud

The Bookshop Guru

Living with Bipolar

Sometimes it’s difficult to express how I feel living with bipolar. But I have to say I am disappointed and frustrated with how things have turned out.  Sales of my book have been disappointing, maybe that’s due to the fact that the public see that it was a mental health publisher who published my book. Maybe people feel someone who has mental health issues cannot help others cope. I chose to write a book about my experience at university and how to cope with the stresses and strain that university can place on you. I put a lot of effort into writing this book as a real story of how to pass a degree, not only as a study guide but also a witty and personal experience of do’s and don’ts of a passing a degree.

It wasn’t long after passing my MSc that life was about to kick me in the teeth again. I had been offered two highly paid jobs as a software engineer in London. Yet, I found myself in hospital for a month, having had several manic episodes. I was severely ill. Even when I was released from hospital I was still very ill. My world came crashing down. Eventually, I started to write the book. I was still ill, but I hoped the focus of writing would help me recover. Slowly, I did recover, but my career as a software engineer was over. I couldn’t deal with the stress and besides I now had bipolar to contend with.

At the time I was alone and trying to cope with bipolar. My son and daughter didn’t understand what bipolar meant, and nor did I. I had to go out find out myself. I surfed the internet and read what I could about bipolar. I began to understand what bipolar was. Sometimes dealing with bipolar became a living hell. I find bipolar difficult to express and often misunderstood. Eventually, I had regular counselling sessions and still do. I would say to my mental health counsellor and  my doctor that the best way I could describe how I felt was using the analogy of living under a ‘black cloud’ day to day.

Click Below and Listen

Today, I try my best to deal with this disability. But it isn’t easy when that black cloud descends upon me without warning. I find it hard sometimes to do anything. I push myself, but I can’t avoid the ups and downs of this disorder. I imagine and hope that maybe one day my book will help you. Read it and tell me what you think.
Are you listening,  what are you dreaming?

As Jesus said, “belief is everything.”

In my latest book “It’s Never Too Late” read how dreams do come true, but be careful what you wish for. Understand the secret of greed and you will attain one of the secrets of prosperity. The book will also take you on a journey and explores love, money, luck, and much more.


Hey, Chuck. Did you bring any spending money? Viva la vida loca.

Conducting Survey into Precognitive Choices

Which would you prefer half-price digital or paperback?

 Read my latest book "It's Never Too Late" by Anthony Fox,  published by Chipmunka Publishing


  1. Anthony, I read this with sadness and with hope. As you are dealing with your disorder in the best way that you know.
    I encourage you to keep writing, it is very therapeutic.
    People have many different ways of describing their feelings, a black cloud is a good one, and now that you've named it you can know better how to deal with it.
    Take it day by day as you are doing and don't let the black cloud get the best of you.
    Focus on as many positive things as you can when it descends.
    I am not bipolar but have had my days of depression which I called "the black hole" and climbing out of it.
    Don't get discouraged, forge on. Selling books takes time, get your name out there as many places as you can. It's hard, but it's worth it to have a passion and desire in life. Good luck.

    1. Thanks Carol,
      Your words are kind and true. Yes sometimes its like that, but I have learnt new strategies to cope which helps. Anyhow thanks again for your comments.


  2. I really liked this article. There was a discussion thread at one time in Writer's Cafe about how many artistic and creative people suffer from Bi-polar, depression etc. The amount is so high that it must be tied into creativity in some way.

    1. Hi Jeanne,
      Thanks for that. yes you are right from what I have read there are two schools of thought. One believing its basically genetic the other environmental. My view its a combination of both not always equal, but different for everyone.